Depressed, yet happy

I am a clinically depressed, happiness maven. 

Does that sound weird? I guess it’s a little like a professional skier saying they are allergic to snow. The two things don’t seem to go together.

For many years, I experienced extreme highs and tremendous lows. I wasn’t suffering from depression then, nor had I become an advocate for happiness. I was simply living my life.

Why did my emotions fluctuate so much? Because I hadn’t learned that I could choose to shift my perspective and my mood. I was like a small boat, sailing in a large ocean. Sometimes there were gale-force winds, and other times there were gentle breezes.

I believed that life happened to me. All I could do was make the best of the circumstances I found myself in. My life seemed to be black or white. There weren’t many shades of grey.

I lived the same way my mom does, and her mother before her did. I allowed myself to be a victim. Sometimes the world around me was a benevolent friend, but many times it was a horrible bully.

My life was transformed when I began a journey of self-awareness and personal development. I stopped trying to hide the real me. Up until this point, I somehow believed I should be ashamed of who I was. 

This may have been partly due to frequently hearing the phrase, what will the neighbours think? I also watched my siblings get bullied by their school mates. It was obviously dangerous to let the world see me. 

It wasn’t until I found myself in a place that was so dire, I knew something had to change. I was in a suicidal pit of despair when I got pregnant with my first child. I didn’t want her to go through what I was experiencing, so I had to figure things out.

I may have a chemical imbalance that causes depression, but I have chosen to live a happy and fulfilling life despite it. I no longer believe that life happens to me, instead I see it as happening for me.

I am the creator of my life and in full control of how I interpret it.

Does my story resonate with you?

Do you feel like a victim in your life?

Do you want to step out of that role and take charge?

I made sure things were different for my children and now I help other people make this leap in their own lives. Don’t worry. I’m not selling anything.

Any type of personal or professional development starts in the same place. It starts with increased self-awareness. The more you know yourself, the easier it is to navigate your world and make choices that serve you.

I have been asked to speak at the Staples Business Centre in Kelowna on International Women’s Day and I would like to invite you to join me for this free event. 

I am going to lead participants through the self-assessment step of the Myers Briggs Type Indicator.

If you aren’t familiar with the MBTI, it is an assessment designed to help people become more aware of their strengths and challenges.

Self-assessment is a step that is frequently missed by people who use Myers Briggs. They assume that whatever the online assessment says your personality type is, will be correct. Wrong.

The assessment is only as good as the answers you give, and different responses may apply depending on the area of your life you are thinking about. 

In my experience, the self-assessment phase has far more value and gives greater understanding about why people behave the way they do. 

No type is better or worse than another, they are just different. You will become more aware of your own personality and those of the people you work, live, and play with.

Tickets are free, but you need to register through Eventbrite. Follow this link.

I would love to see you there:

It’s Not Personal, It’s Personality: Navigating relationships with MBTI

Date: Sunday, March 8, 2020 (International Women’s Day)

Time: 1 p.m. to 2:30 p.m.

Location: Staples Business Centre, Kelowna

This article is written by or on behalf of an outsourced columnist and does not necessarily reflect the views of Castanet.